The Three Pillars of Thai Lifestyle

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Anthony Bourdain is a well-known author and chef who travels around the world in search of interesting dining experiences. His perspectives on different cultures are often irreverent and insightful at the same time. Here is something he mentioned about Thailand:
“The notion that before you even set out to go to Thailand, you say, ‘I’m not interested,’ or you’re unwilling to try things that people take so personally and are so proud of and so generous with, I don’t understand that, and I think it’s rude. You’re at Grandma’s house, you eat what Grandma serves you.”
This quote resonates with us because during our time in Thailand, we’ve found that our neighbors and new friends are very generous with us. They’re always curious to see how we are adapting to the Thai lifestyle. Is the food too spicy for us? Do we like singing karaoke? Have we learned to speak Thai yet?”
Also, as AFM missionaries, we want the people we serve to see that we are genuinely interested in their way of life. When we are in their homes, we want to be open to receiving what they so proudly want to share with us.
So, what is the Thai lifestyle like? How do people live day to day in this strange and exotic land?
Recently, Jared was teaching an English class for the Thai staff and teachers at our school. The students were learning about the lifestyles of people groups from various countries. Near the end of the lesson, Jared asked the students to use some of the language they had learned to talk about Thai lifestyle. Pee Nong (Pee means older sibling), who is the school manager, quickly responded, “Thai people don’t care much about work. We just want to make enough money to be comfortable so we can do the three things that are the most important part of our lifestyle. First, we want to tam boon (make merit). Second, we want to bpai tiaow (go on a trip). And third, we want to gin aahan (eat food),” he said, counting them off on his fingers. “If we have enough money to do these things, then we are happy.”

Make Merit (Tam Boon)
The Isaan Thai people make merit in various ways: By giving offerings to monks or to the Lord Buddha. By listening to Buddhist sermons and teachings. By donating funds for the support of temples. By feeding monks regularly. By becoming a Buddhist monk or nun for a period of time. By keeping the holy days and participating in the monthly rituals.
Why is making merit so important to the Isaan people? The majority of the people in Northeast Thailand are rice farmers. They depend on the earth and the seasonal rains for their livelihood. Some years, rainfall is plentiful, and the Isaan have enough rice to eat and, therefore, enjoy full village life. Some years, the rainfall is inadequate, and the villagers will experience rice shortage. The common fear of the Isaan villagers is to not have enough rice and therefore experience poverty. They view farm life as difficult and unstable because of nature and the spirits who control nature. Merit-making is important to remove them from their present social status and to improve their social status in the next life. Magico-animist beliefs also help the Isaan to manipulate power from nature, or spirits that control nature, which assists them in their rice planting and, essentially, survival.
In other words, the success of the farmers’ harvest is directly related to the amount and quality of merit they’ve made. And if they have a successful harvest, their social status can improve. They can build a nice house. They can buy a new pick-up truck. They can give a generous donation to the temple (something that helps them gain face in the community). They can send their kids to a good school. They can set aside money for the future. In short, if they are successful at making merit, they don’t have to worry about being poor and unhappy. And no Thai person, or anyone else for that matter, wants to be poor and unhappy.
As Christian missionaries, we don’t believe anyone can compel God to give us success in life because of our works. However, we do remember that the Scripture says, “You reap what you sow.” It would be easy for us to judge the Thai Christians we know who go to church to hear the sermon because it is tam boon. Or to pity the ignorance of the Thai grandma who always brings food to the pastor because it is tam boon. Or to disregard the generosity of the wealthy church member who helped build the local church school because we suspect is was just tam boon. Thank God, we don’t have the burden of judging the motives of the heart. That’s His job.

Take a Trip (Bpai Tiaow)
Nong Ming (Nong means younger sibling) is in her mid-twenties and is the office manager for our language school. She is an Adventist Christian, and like all Thai people, she loves to bpai tiaow.
We have four student missionaries from Walla Walla University working at the language school now, and Nong Ming always says how much she loves to bpai tiaow with them. Whenever Nong Ming gets bored at work, she will stop what she’s working on, let out a long sigh and exclaim, “I want to bpai tiaow with the teachers. Let’s take the teachers and go somewhere.”
Recently, fellow missionary to Thailand, Daniëlle K., told us that, in her experience, Thai people always want to bpai tiaow. The Thai people are always ready to get away for some fun and relaxation.
Bpai tiaow can be just a short day trip to a park or waterfall for a picnic or shopping at the mall and having lunch together. But usually bpai tiaow means to take a trip somewhere for a few days. A group of coworkers might rent a tour bus to take them to visit some ancient ruins and other tourist attractions. At night, they would probably hang out, eat food and sing karaoke together. Maybe a family from Bangkok might take a long weekend to get out of the city and stay at a resort on the beach. Bpai tiaow could be a group of friends going camping at a national park. Wherever they go, Thai people are always ready and willing to bpai tiaow.

Eat Food (Gin Aahan)
The other day, Jared was getting ready to teach his English class for the Thai staff and teachers. As he was in the classroom preparing, he looked at his watch and realized it was almost fifteen minutes past the start time, and he had no students. So he walked out of the school and went looking for them. Can you guess where he found them? That’s right. He found them all sitting together eating.
“Sorry, Teacher Jared. We had a special program this morning and there was a lot of food left over. Come and eat with us.”
As Americans, our thinking is to work hard all day and then have fun and relax after work. But that’s not the Thai way. Thai people work hard, but they like to take breaks throughout the day. When they stop to rest, they like to gin aahan (eat food) while visiting with friends.
Also Americans tend to believe the main purpose for eating is to refuel our bodies so we can get back to work or play. So we eat quickly, and often alone. In Thailand, eating a meal is something you should do slowly and with other people. It’s a time to relax, laugh and enjoy each other’s company. Gin aahan is one of the ways people make and maintain relationships.
At first, Jared was a little frustrated that his students had ditched his class. But when he saw that everyone was smiling and genuinely wanted him to join them, he couldn’t stay upset. Eating and sharing food together is a big part of Thai lifestyle.
It’s interesting to observe and learn about Thai lifestyle. There are some parts of the Thai way of life that are challenging for us, but there is also so much we can embrace. It is our hope that someday many of the Isaan Buddhist people of Thailand will come to realize that Jesus has made all the merit they will ever need. That God wants to give them peace, joy and status in His kingdom freely. That Jesus is coming back soon, and He wants to take all of us on an amazing trip—to bpai tiaow with us to the special place that is waiting for us in Heaven. And when we get there, we will all sit down and gin aahan together.

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